Hollywood Planning 498 New Superhero Movies in New Year - Daily Squib

LOS ANGELES - USA - This year will see another torrent of superhero movies from Hollywood.
http://bit.ly/2zVwbqr

North Korean New Year Fireworks Celebration Goes Well - Daily Squib

PYONGYANG - N. Korea - This year's new year fireworks extravaganza has wowed not only the capital but the rest of the world.
http://bit.ly/2Ch0QV3

Corbyn Getting Ready to Be PM - Number 10 in New Year - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - The DS has had exclusive access to Jeremy Corbyn's entourage, and was allowed to divulge important information regarding the bid for taking Number 10 Downing Street in a political coup that would make any revolutionary shudder with true delight.
http://bit.ly/2BlvPiq

Tech Experts: Internet 2.0 Transition Beginning Soon - Daily Squib

THE NOOSPHERE - Government approved, control of every facet of the internet, an internet where all info will be gradually controlled and changed to fit a specific agenda.
http://bit.ly/2z3p1jl

We Forgot About the New Star Wars Film - Daily Squib

HOLLYWOOD - USA - We forgot about the new mediocre Star Wars film that just came out.
http://bit.ly/2BdRrNI

May's FAKE BREXIT: Mass Civil Unrest and Anarchy on the Streets of Britain - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - Theresa May's Remainer, Non Brexit, could be the precursor for thirty years of riots in the UK.
http://bit.ly/2kfbFMh

Theresa May Applauded by EU leaders Because She 'made little effort bending over', Jean-Claude Juncker Says Ahead of Deal - Daily Squib

BRUSSELS - Belgium - European leaders are set to give their approval for Brexit talks to move on to the next phase today after Jean-Claude Juncker said last week's divorce deal amounted to "sufficient progress after massive concessions by the British".
http://bit.ly/2jVtq36

Stop Moaning Farage and Do Something About May's Non Brexit - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - A brief open communique to Chief Brexiteer Nigel Farage.
http://bit.ly/2CchBNI

FAKE NEWS: Donald Trump Outraged at New Book That Reimagines Strange Historical Facts Through His Eyes - Daily Squib

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - Donald Trump today declared that all books written by satirical author David Hutter be incinerated in the White House incinerator.
http://bit.ly/2o0JPrI

Daily Squib in Talks With Egyptian Courts to Release Singer Who Ate Banana - Daily Squib

CAIRO - Egypt - A court which gave a two year jail sentence to a singer who appeared in a music video eating a banana has been petitioned by our lawyers and should be released soon.
http://bit.ly/2nV1vET

Russians Now Living in Extreme Poverty Levels - Daily Squib

MOSCOW - Russia - The divide between rich and poor Russians has become wider under Vladimir Putin's reign.
http://bit.ly/2yiAivX

Guy Verhofstadt, the European Parliament’s Brexit Coordinator Eats Cockroach On Live TV - Daily Squib

STRASBOURG - France - The so-called Brexit negotiations were today put on hold as Guy Verhofstadt ate fourteen cockroaches whilst talking at the EU parliament building.
http://bit.ly/2yioJF3

#youtoo Sexual Harassment Hashtag Takes Over Twitter - Daily Squib

SAN FRANCISCO - USA - Men who have unjustifiably been accused of sexual harassment and unjustly tried on social networks by self-appointed judges with no evidence to back up their claims, are fighting back with a #youtoo hashtag.
http://bit.ly/2yifR26

John Cleese in Cafe Breastfeeding Row - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - John Cleese, English actor and comedian has been involved in a breastfeeding row at The Grosvenor café Soho.
http://bit.ly/2yhRJwC

Feminists Want 'Phallic' Christmas Trees Banned - Daily Squib

LOS ANGELES - USA - Feminist groups are urging the banning of all Christmas trees, usually used in the Christmas season and decorated, to be banned as they represent a fertile phallus as conducted in Pagan ceremonies thousands of years ago, and later adopted by Christians.
http://bit.ly/2AvLvz4

Triumphant Theresa May Delivers Non-Brexit - Daily Squib

BRUSSELS - Belgium - A jubilant and triumphant Theresa May today patted herself on the back for delivering a Brexit that is not actually a Brexit but is technically a Brexit only in name.
http://bit.ly/2yhvc2M

Trump Recognizes Kiev, Ukraine as Russia's Capital - Daily Squib

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - President Donald Trump recognized Kiev as Russia's capital on Wednesday and announced plans to relocate the US Embassy there, a move expected to inflame tensions in the region and unsettle the prospects for peace.
http://bit.ly/2AvnJ6q

Urusalima: There is No Peaceful Solution to a 4,000 Year Old Problem - Daily Squib

JERUSALEM - Israel - The problem of land ownership of this region of the Middle East has been ongoing for thousands of years.
http://bit.ly/2Ad7Z7U

Welcome to Donkey Brexit Britain! - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - Welcome to donkey Britain, the laughing stock of the world where Brexit means no Brexit.
http://bit.ly/2npYqwp

Why the Government Will Not Be Able to Regulate Cryptocurrencies - Daily Squib

NOOSPHERE - If there is proof needed that idiots run governments, trying to regulate cryptocurrencies is another verifiable reason that governments are indeed overrun by idiots.
http://bit.ly/2zKMrex

Today the Day Theresa May Starts Looking For Another Job - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - Downing Street officials have confirmed that today is the day Theresa May will be looking for another job after giving away multiple concessions to Brussels during Brexit negotiations.
http://bit.ly/2npxUDc

Trump Tweet to Daily Squib Demands Removal of Interview - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - In a twitter tweet today, President Trump demanded the Daily Squib take down an interview we conducted with him in 2016.
http://bit.ly/2nkhLPA

The Evil of Tony Blair Never Falters - Daily Squib

PARIS - France - Former British PM, Tony Blair, has been speaking to the French about thwarting Brexit.
http://bit.ly/2ng4Yxt

Moaning Luvvie and His Continual Last Film

CORK - Ireland - According to eternally moaning luvvie Daniel Day Lewis, this is his last film, just like his other last film.
http://bit.ly/2zBpbiS

BAD DEAL: Weak Theresa May to Pay EU Ransom 100 Billion Euros - Daily Squib

BRUSSELS - Belgium - Theresa May has capitulated to the EU ransom demands and will pay them 100 Billion euros.
http://bit.ly/2zyKKkn

London Mayor's Gender Neutral Toilets Have Holes in Them - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - Sadiq Khan’s planning blueprint will call for more gender neutral loos, and different types of toilets to cater to people’s differing needs.
http://bit.ly/2zC70tD

New Reality Show: I'm a Celebrity Sex-Pest Get Me In There - Daily Squib

BORNEO - Channel 5 are piloting a new reality show from entertainment company Endemol called "I'm a Celebrity Sex-Pest Get Me In There".
http://bit.ly/2iXC7cF

Royal Family Prepares Itself For Arrival of Creole Princess - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - The Royal family prepare to move into the 21st Century by welcoming Prince Harry's new bride-to-be Meghan Markle.
http://bit.ly/2BiHyJR

BREXIT: EU High Representative Joins Discussion With Theresa May

BRUSSELS - Belgium - The EU Commission brought out their secret weapon that they have been hiding throughout Brexit talks.
http://bit.ly/2B7A0cX

Black Friday Pandemic Spreading Across Globe

USA - There's a virus that has been around since the dawn of time, and now it is so prevalent that it is in fact taking over the globe.
http://bit.ly/2iLzbzM

and the Epica Awards For 2017 Go to?

BERLIN - Germany - It has truly been an honour for the Daily Squib to have been chosen as part of the jury for this year's Epica Awards, a creative maelstrom of work submitted from all over the world in the field of advertising.
http://bit.ly/2iHk2iX

Good News: EU Has Change of Heart Lets Britain Go Without Ransom Payment - Daily Squib

BRUSSELS - Belgium - Much like a kind hearted hostage taker, the EU has had a pleasant change of heart, and will let Britain leave without having to pay a massive ransom payment.
http://bit.ly/2izQ8NB

The Intrinsic Difference Between Satire and 'Fake News' - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - The literary genre of satire has been mislabelled by the ignorant as 'fake news'. Nothing can be further from the truth.
http://bit.ly/2AS8TCJ

Mugabe Democratic Election Into Obscurity Goes Well - Daily Squib

HARARE - Zimbabwe - Former president Robert Mugabe is under house arrest after a military coup overthrowing him from his terrible reign.
http://bit.ly/2imSE9E

Mild Mannered Christians Proclaim Jihad On Greggs Bakery - Daily Squib

OXFORD - England - In response to an advertisement depicting a Greggs sausage roll instead of Jesus in a Manger, many Christians have declared Jihad on the bakery.
http://bit.ly/2ALGJJs

Researchers Grow Massive Frankenstein Brain in Lab For First Time - Daily Squib

DÜSSELDORF - Germany - In a huge scientific breakthrough, researchers have been growing 'Frankenstein' mega brains in a lab in a bid to uncover the secrets behind the workings of brains.
http://bit.ly/2ikUZSB

West Entering New Puritanical Age - Daily Squib

LOS ANGELES - USA - One thing we have learned about puritanical Millenials schooled by mainly Marxist tutors over the years, is that we are now entering an age of puritanism.
http://bit.ly/2i6Xjg8

Carving Up the Turkey This Christmas Will Be Fun - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - Gone before Christmas, Theresa May must now know that the betting odds are against her.
http://bit.ly/2hX1MBL

Why Pretty Patel Should Not Be Sacked - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - Theresa May must not sack Priti Patel. We give good reasons for our stance.
http://bit.ly/2Anj3uW

Black Plague Spreads - When Mother Nature Fights Back - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - The secretive think tank which deals with overpopulation matters called CULL, release their latest communique.
http://bit.ly/2AmCHH8

What Do the Vegas Mass Shooting and Dallas Church Massacre Have in Common? - Daily Squib

TEXAS - USA - The most recent mass shooting in a Texan church that killed 26 people leads to a pattern
http://bit.ly/2Aif6r1

Consensus: Socialists More Dangerous When Out of Power - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - The socialists now out of power in America and the UK are utilising guerilla soviet destabilising techniques on society and the current right-leaning establishment.
http://bit.ly/2hLjSXe

New Hollywood Movie: 'Meet the Fockers Part Deux' Hits Box Office - Daily Squib

LOS ANGELES - USA - The latest addition to the celebrated Fockers series of movies has hit the box office with sales hitting the cutting room floor.
http://bit.ly/2Ad0CsK

The Queen Opens Personal Facebook Account - Daily Squib

BALMORAL - Scotland - Her majesty the Queen has opened a Facebook account.
http://bit.ly/2A3hou5

Theresa May: "Men Will Have to Go Through Five Govt Agencies When Coming On to Women" - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - Prime Minister Theresa May has bowed down to Commons pressure and revealed a White Paper plan to solve the crisis hitting Britain and the Western World regarding men and their relations to women.
http://bit.ly/2hz3rNH

New Yorkers Take to Stilts and Pogo Sticks For Safe Walking and Cycling - Daily Squib

NEW YORK - USA - Following the latests terrorist outrage where an ISIS operative mowed down innocent cyclists, New Yorkers have taken to stilts and other methods of transport.
http://bit.ly/2hxp3Kj

MP: "Women Should Never Have Been Allowed in Parliament" - Daily Squib

LONDON - England - An MP who stood up today in the House of Commons and spoke, has been hounded out of parliament.
http://bit.ly/2zS74VU

Berlin Wall Fall - Catalonia Independence Revolution - End of EU Soviet Union - Daily Squib

BARCELONA - Catalonia - This is the beginning of the end of Soviet EU rule with the separation state declaring independence from the Spanish sector of the Soviet EUnion.
http://bit.ly/2zME9Cr

#metoo Trump is Probably Next On the List

WASHINGTON D.C - USA - As the bloodletting continues for some men in power, is Donald Trump next?
http://bit.ly/2he8kLQ

Toxic Clintons to be Dumped in the Atlantic Ocean - Daily Squib

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - The Clintons are now so toxic in American politics with their double-dealing crooked ways, that even the elites are washing their hands of them.
http://bit.ly/2iBo13h